What big changes have you gone through in the past year?: "So following from that last bit....thenstart of lockdown last year was what I see as a violent act towards my home and family, our house was raided and I lost my co parent, my children lost their father, and suddenly we had no support from anywhere. Lockdown was in full swing and I love far from my familybamd friends at least 60 miles. My car was also arrested and it took me months of stress and debt to get it back. We were virtual prisoners in our own home at that time. I couldn't go out. I'm a disabled single mum of 3, I have paralysis in my right arm. Shopping became a nightmare with young kids no car and a disability. I was totally on my own and I've never experienced isolation quite like it. My mums cancer returned making the situation worse. It means I haven't seen my parents for 6 months now. Mentally it's so draining. It's easier now bit last summer I was a zombie, I would never have a second to myself, constantly on the go being a parents during my waking hours and sleeping with the children only to wake up and face the same groundhog day of isolation and house imprisonment. When September came and the children went back to school, thats when groundhog day stopped, suddenly time began moving in a forward meaningful trajectory. My youngest had turned 4 so he began full time school, a totally new thing. For 7 years I've been a staybat home mum looking after babies amd toddlers and all of a sudden I had time to myself. My head improved as I began to do things for myself. I began running innthe woods again, an activity I'd not been able to do since lockdown began as I cant go trail running with small children, suddenly inwas child free. I had been with my children 24/7 since march, this was just amazing. Time for me, time to think. Although i was still stressed by the absent parent and surmounting debt. With that time for myself I began to think about returning to work. I got a job, far below my qualifications but I really don't care as its a job and one I love. I'm a special needs teaching assistant at my youngest children's school. It's great, I work 2 minutes from my house, I drop my boys in their classrooms and then walk to mine. Its the perfect job, and now I've been working there since December, im getting the hang of it, really getting into the swing of it...so much so that last night I made proper plans with myself. I'm going to restart my PhD, I left 7 years ago owing to my accident that left my arm paralysed, I need loads of operations and physio and the PhD became a little too much with all the medical stuff going on too. I decided to have 2 more babies and be a stay at home mum my choice, a choice im proud of. But now it's my time, this is my year, my children are getting older amd less demanding and I need to follow my goals. I've got a job that meets my universal credit commitments, I work 31 hours and I'm above the pay threshold meaning hopefully, fingers crossed, if my proposal is accepted, I can hopefully get the student loan to cover fees etc, and drop a day at work, and begin the PhD. I've done all the work for the MPhil, so I'm hoping I can knock some time off. So yes. A very turbulent year, marked by a violent loss of a helpful co parent. Being made to everything myself in isolation. I forgot to add that this put a strain on my bad arm and in September as a direct result of having to do 100% of everything for the home and kids, I tore my rotator cuff...I couldn't go for surgery, and still haven't, hecaus either havent got anyone to look after the children while I recover. So instead consultant keeps putting steroid injections in to keep me going. My last one ran our this week. Im in agony. But im string I'll hit through it, hopefully last year was the basemark 0 year."

Callie I
Apr 25, 2021

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